Miriam Margolyes

National treasure Margolyes has resurrected her claim that Arnie deliberately farted in her face during the making of the 1999 film End of Days.

There was the time she farted on command during a Cameo message for the reasonable price of £141. Could the Schwarzenegger story be Margolyes’s attempt to quash her own fart videos with an even grabbier fart story about someone she doesn’t like? Now, the search engines are swamped with news outlets breathlessly reporting the Schwarzenegger fart, so much so that searches for ‘Miriam Margolyes fart’ will throw up an impenetrable wall of Schwarzenegger fart reportage. Of course, a cynic might suggest that Margolyes told a story about someone deliberately farting on her for a different reason. Her stories on The Graham Norton Show are legendary, the memoir she published last year cemented her reputation as a world-class storyteller, and she recently went viral on TikTok for saying: “England is fucking shite at the moment, they’re all cuntfaces and I hate it.” Because, thanks to an anecdote from one of the film’s actors, End of Days deserves to go down in history for one very important reason. The story, as brilliantly horrible as it is, looks set to reignite a one-sided feud that has rolled along for more than two decades.